Dear COA Family,
A few weeks ago, I spoke during service about the importance of
building others up. The apostle Paul commands us to “encourage one
another and build one another up” (1 Thessalonians 5:11). We can do
this through our compliments towards others.
How can we give good and sincere compliments?
1. Be genuine, not flattering
A sincere compliment flows from honest observation, not from a desire
to impress. People can usually tell the difference. Instead of “You’re so
good at everything”, try “I really appreciate how patiently you explained
that to me”.
2. Be specific
Specific compliments feel more real and meaningful. They show you truly
noticed something. Instead of “Good job”, try “Your choice of songs brought
out the message in a very clear and engaging way”.
3. Focus on effort and attitude
Praising effort encourages humility and growth rather than pride. Instead of
“You are so smart”, try “I respect how much preparation you put into this” or
“Your willingness to serve quietly really blesses the team”.
4. Keep it appropriate and timely
Give compliments at the right moment and in the right way. Private
compliments can be more meaningful for personal matters. Public
compliments can encourage and affirm someone before others.
Why am I sharing this? All of us, including and especially our leaders, need
your encouragement. And compliments and words of gratitude are not hard
for us to say, yet we seem to be so stingy with them. Perhaps it is because
we are Asians and our culture is to refrain from over-praising others.
It is so important for us to speak up when necessary. Proverbs 27:5 tells us,
“An open rebuke is better than hidden love”. Compliments kept to ourselves
in our hearts benefit no one as they will never be received by our hearers.
Let us be “God’s encouragers” to others this week!
God bless,
Revd Ian